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Why Cody Hates Things
December 1st, 2006 10:57 AM by Cody Silfies
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Animation Editorial

It seems like it's been ages since I've written anything of particular interest for the main page of ANXToonami.com. Part of that lies in the fact that this semester has been artistically challenging, emotionally draining and time intensive. Another part lies in the fact that I've been tediously toiling away behind the scenes to fully realize a perceived greatness (and lo and behold, Preston's been helping!), of which I hope to have finished before 2010 for your viewing receptacles. However I feel an even greater part of my not having written anything in ages lies in the fact that I simply find myself hating Cartoon Network.

I hate the corporate attitude they flaunt. I hate what they stand for. I hate the fact that they feel they can toss away the people who made them a household name. I hate that they are no longer innovative, creative, interesting or otherwise their own entity; but rather a second rate carbon copy of their strongest competitors. For a lack of a better analogy, they're the "Dr. Thunder" to Dr. Pepper; a cheap imitation with second-rate ingredients only put forth to capitalize on a number of mouths who prefer that brand of carbonated beverage.

Cartoon Network is not in it for the entertainment, despite being a channel whose goal is producing entertainment. A part of me accepts this; mainly because apathetic businessmen whom loom around in the shadows whispering this model into our ears have been drilling it into our heads. "Cartoon Network is a business!," "We need to appeal to the masses to stay afloat and appease our revenue!" -- the statements go on and on. However, how a business can appeal to the masses is key to their success as well. Ben and Jerry's for instance, is a company that revolves around the market of a particular frozen desert. It's a business, one whose source of revenue relies not on presenting themselves as a friendly company that people can relate to, but for producing a good product. Yet unlike Cartoon Network, Ben and Jerry's does present itself with a friendly face. They don't talk down to their customers and while I'm sure they crunch statistics, run tests on their sales and do the wonderful numbers dance to determine the next crazy combo of cavity-educing goodness, they do not allow it to be the face of their company. As a result their product is all the more recognizable and desired, not only for the product's quality (and really, Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream is rivaled by no other) but for the company image.

Yet current Cartoon Network seems to lack all of these traits. They're the guys carrying a clipboard and wearing a business suit on a Sunday. They're all about the stats, where each viewer is nothing but a number -- categorized by age, sex & location. They make no apologizes to this image; in fact they oddly embrace it in all its awful, cold and unappealing glory. Even if I disregarded Ben and Jerry's company image and based my opinion of the company souly on product quality -- it's still a test that Cartoon Network fails.

Glimmers of brilliance pop in and out of the schedule in the same way cosmic dust gives way to beauty before an exploded star turns into a black hole devoid of anything, left over genius from an unapologetically different and unique Cartoon Network of yesteryear. Meanwhile, replicated fads and formulaic reincarnations are practically forced down viewer's throats, as if those in charge are exclaiming "LIKE IT, BUY IT!" to the poor innocent souls they're trying to ensnare in their web of marketing and revenue.

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